Friday, June 21, 2013

Stories From the Weekend

Sometimes I find myself going months without having any funny notable stories to share.  Months!  This past weekend I had five.  Because of the influx of stories, I decided I just had to share them.

On Friday I was sitting at a park, talking to my dear sister, Cassidy.  I was lying on my back with my eyes closed when I sensed someone had walked up to me and stopped.  I cracked an eye open and saw a boy around the age of 8, standing there looking at me.  He asked if I wanted candy, to which I kindly declined. He replied, "Ok," but then started to bend down towards me as if to still give me some candy.  Instead of candy though, I got a snail placed on my elbow.  And then the boy was off and running toward all his other friends.  He caught me by surprise, but if I ever seem little Timmy again, he's going down.

That same day, I went to the Orem CityFest with my friends.  We waited in line for 45 minutes to an hour to ride the Ferris Wheel that they had there.  When we finally got on, I started to get sick after only going two times around. Yes, on a Ferris Wheel.

Saturday I'm sitting at the Spanish Fork Reservoir with some friends.  We'd just gone swimming with our floating noodles and now we were drying off in the sun.  These 4 Mexican men (nationality important as they did not speak English) walked past us and settled down on the other side of us.  I was reading a book when mayhem suddenly broke out among the Mexicans.  They were shouting things in Spanish and thrashing about in the water.  I said to my friends, "Um.. I think they're drowning."  My friends assured me that they were just joking around. One of the Mexicans started to grab onto his friend's head.  .  I got up to help them, but my friends called me back, saying they were most likely joking around.  After a little bit longer of this I held up the noodle and asked if they wanted it, to which they frantically nodded yes.  I ran there and threw the guy the noodle and he latched onto it, gasping for air.  Saved a life.  They didn't even thank me.  I about turned around and yelled de nada at them.  Also, who on earth decides to go swimming when you can't swim? Not that I'm judging.

Later that night, we went to play volleyball at my friend's grandparent's house in Alpine. On the first play of the game I dove to get the ball.  While diving, I felt something and slightly heard something rip.  I got up and was all, "Oh hey, I'm just going to use the restroom real quick."  Went in to investigate, and my pants had ripped. SIlver lining of the occasion was that the rip wasn't really visible, so at least no one got a view of my underwear.

On Monday (yes, I realize it doesn't classify as the weekend), the little boys were back for more.  I didn't realize it was the same group of boys until they started chanting, "Who's that, who's that, who's that with the book." I ignored them.  Right when I was about to leave, I heard one of them run up behind me.  He shouted, "You're cute," and ran away laughing.  Looks like I have a little fan club.  Again I was shocked so my threats for little Timmy were empty.  But next time, I'm tackling him and giving him a wedgie.

Friday, June 14, 2013

Making It Rain Food

A couple of months ago my coworker had her birthday.  During her birthday week, I traveled with her to all these different restaurants so that she could get free food that she had signed up for.  Up to this point, I had, had no idea you could get that much food just for having a birthday. Naturally, I immediately went home and signed up for all the free food as well.

When my birthday week came, all the emails full for free food started piling in.   I was VERY excited.  It started out nice, as I just went during my lunch break to some of the smaller things that I got for free.  Then the free food just started to pour in, thanks to other occasions such as my sister's graduation and dinner group.  I could not keep up with all the free food.  At one point during the week I had Cafe Rio, Red Robin, Chiles, and Firehouse Sub in my fridge, and had plans to go out to eat at least three more times.  First world birthday problems; they're real.

On my actual birthday, the most ridiculous moment of getting free food happened.  I went to Red Robin with my friends so that I could use my free burger coupon and not have my friends pay for me (I'm such a good friend, I know).  My roommate, Nanette, used to work there, so she hooked us up with some free appetizers for my birthday.  Free food again!  It gets better though.  The waitress came over to put the appetizers on the table, and her hand slipped.  The appetizers, along with all different types of sauce went all over my friend sitting right next to me.  She had it dripping down her hair and all over her clothes.  A couple of drops of fry sauce also landed on my skirt, but with the fry sauce dripping off of my friend, I didn't dare complain.  Then the manger of Red Robin rushed out to apologize, telling us that they were going to comp the meals for the three of us "hit" by any of the sauces or food, and they'd pay for any dry cleaning that needed to be done.  And if that wasn't nice enough, they told me they'd throw in a free dessert for my birthday.  I'm sure by friend would've rather not had to deal with all the sauce dripping down her, but it was a good deal for me!  Although, it did mean I would need to return once more to Red Robin within the next week.

Moral of the story, it is possible to get too much free food and to get sick of eating out.  Other moral of the story, one of the easiest ways to get free food is by going to a restaurant in some grungy clothes, "accidentally" tripping a waitress/waiter, while simultaneously getting the food spilled on you.  It's fool proof!  Unless the restaurant isn't as awesome as Red Robin, in which case, you just managed to get your grungy clothes even more grungy looking.

Sidenotes from my birthday:

1.  Nanette is seriously the greatest.  I woke up to an amazing breakfast and a table covered in sticky notes that had nice things about me written on them.

This is Nanette.  She is a saint.  

2.  Apparently I'm the new cyber cat lady.  For my birthday I had 9 different cat pictures either posted on my facebook wall or emailed to me, 3 weird interesting exercising with cat videos emailed to me, and 1 cat pen given to me as a gift.  While I'm a little concerned my secret has gotten out, I've embraced all things cat.
How can you not love something like this?

3.  I have really great friends and family who made my birthday wonderful this year.  Here's to another year!

The girl on the far left is the one who had the fry sauce land on her