Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Sara Smith's Conscience

I pulled a prank 3 years ago.  A prank that will go down in infamy for how awesome it was.  Recently the prankee decided to blog about it and in the process got some crucial details wrong.  So, I'm here to set the record straight.

I guess I can't really take full credit for my prank.  That goes to the boy who stole my phone and put himself in as "my conscience".   That was about as much as he did, and I quickly discovered that he was the perpetrator.  Being the copy cat I am I of course decided to do the same thing to an unknowing victim, but make it ten times better.

I had the perfect victim, Cassidy's roommate Sara.  Since she was Cassidy's roommate, we'd easily be able to get my number into her phone under the name My Conscience, AND Cassidy would easily be able to update me on her activity.  We covered our tracks well.  I had no voicemail set up, and we didn't foresee Sara ever asking for my number.

The day after we planted the name in her phone was Sunday.  Cassidy provided me with the description of one of Sara's favorite dresses and I went to work.

My Conscience: I really think you should wear the short sleeved red dress today.  It looks great on you!

Sara:  Um.. who is this, and how do you know about my dress

My Conscience:  I'm your conscience and as your conscience I know all about your life.  

Sara:  How did you get into my phone?  Who is this?  And anyway, I was really wanting to wear the blue and black dress today.  

My Conscience:  No you should stick with the red dress.  I promise, it'll attract the boys.

Immediately after receiving this text Sara tried to call me multiple times.

Sara: Why aren't you answering?!

My Conscience:  You can't actually talk to your conscience on the phone!  Do you think you have special privileges or something.  If you need something you can just text me.  Consider yourself lucky that you can even do that.

Sara: Tell me who this is!  You are so weird.

Sara then preceded to check if her roommates was the perpetrator, which of course they weren't.

That night I went and hung out with Cassidy, Sara, and a couple of boys in their ward.  While she was talking to a boy, I again decided to reach out to her.

My Conscience:  Did you know that your blushing right now?  

At this point Sara freaked out, and told everyone in the room.  The blinds were open so they looked outside to see if someone could be looking in the window.  Sara decided to call the number again, but my phone was on vibrate in my pocket and I was able to evade being caught.

Throughout the week Cassidy would text me and tell me some of the things that Sara was doing, and I would then text her.  Midweek I had what I thought was the greatest epiphany ever.  I should create a facebook page for dear Sara Smith's Conscience!  So that's exactly what I did.  Nothing like bombarding her through as much social media as possible to get her to freak out.  I'm fairly confident I accomplished my designs.

My first post after adding over 100 of her friends was:

Little did I know she had actually been debating going to class that day.  Turns out I was really getting ESP in regards to her thoughts.  

Once Sara caught wind of this page she really started to freak out.

As an explanation for the post directly above, I got her birth date wrong and put it for 6 days after her actual birthday.  

Sara continued to try her best to figure out who I was for 2 months by calling me or asking around to see if any  I think sometime around the one month mark she decided to just embrace the situation she was in realizing that she had a reliable friend who would always respond with some fairly decent advice.  She began to randomly text me and ask me for my sound advice.

Sara: Who should I date?

My Conscience: Jimmer Fredette (Keep in mind this was WAY before he was famous and still known as the back-up point guard.)

Sara:  (After looking Jimmer's picture up)  Ooh he is cute I approve.  How would you suggest I go about dating him?

My Conscience:  Well since you work for BYU broadcasting you should try and swing an interview for him.  

Several hours later

Sara:  Ooh, ooh look at the moon it's so beautiful!

My Conscience: What is it with you people and the moon?

I'd say that things were going pretty great at this point and I was feeling pretty good about my skills as a conscience.  Then one day while hanging out and laughing with some friends, my sister called me and told me that her boy had broken up with her.   Completely distracted by all that was happening, I picked up my phone when it rang again and distractedly answered the phone.  Suddenly I was being verbally attacked by a man who worked for the so called BYU police because the owner of this phone had broken some rule on campus (the details of the conversation are a bit hazy).  Since I wasn't even a BYU student I was notably confused and couldn't understand what on earth I'd done to invoke their wrath.  When they asked me my name I easily complied and told them who I was.  This was met by whoopings on the other line followed by Sara coming on the line to call me a stinker and all sorts of demeaning names.  Dismayed that my rouse had been found out in such a way , I cut the conversation short using the excuse that I had to rush to the side of  my dear sister.

Needless to say Cassidy and I were a bit downhearted that night.  Admittedly, her night was a bit worse, but hey, she went on to marry that same guy so it wasn't that bad of an ending for her.  And I ended up with bragging rights for a creative prank that landed me a friend instead of an enemy.